and I'm nothing like you
by staringatstars07
Summary: For as long as he can remember, Azurite has desired nothing but to serve Homeworld. However, after proving himself competent beyond his intended purpose, he's been shipped off on a mission to Earth, with Black Diamond's favorite gem, Black Sun, as his partner and copilot. There, Azurite will find not everything fits with what they were told. (Canon names will be included later).
1. half of what you

Azurite inputted the terrestrial planet's coordinates with significantly more force than was strictly necessary, then quickly checked his peripheral vision to ensure that his copilot on this mission had not taken note of his brief lapse in composure.

Some of the fluorescent green thrown off by the control panel caught on a lock of raven black hair, and Azurite slid his gaze over his shoulder to see Black Sun smirking, hands crossed over her chest. She'd swung her seat away from the console, leaving Azurite alone to do the work of keeping their ship on course. There was something predatory about her, an instability hidden deep in her glittering black eyes, that cautioned the gem to hold his tongue. He was confident she'd been sent with him precisely because the council wanted to rid themselves of two problem gems at once. And if she shattered his gem? All the better.

"Do you plan to ignore me the whole trip, Azurite? That would make for a very boring ride." He wasn't looking at her, he refused to, but she knew she had his attention.

"Forgive me, Black Sun, if my priorities do not include keeping you entertained."

Gleaming white teeth flashed. "Oh, you are a feisty one, aren't you? No wonder you were demoted. The council can't stand gems with backbones." She frowned, a brief thing that disappeared quickly, replaced by her usual smirk. "Or brains, for that matter."

As much as loyalty required he protest at that, Azurite couldn't bring himself to argue. It was pointing out flaws in the plans of his superiors that had led to him being demoted and reassigned to Earth's Kindergarten.

Both the planet and the Kindergarten were long abandoned, so the insult was not subtle, nor was it meant to be.

Azurite was intelligent, hardworking, flexible, and sharp. Were he a Diamond, those traits would have earned him respect, as such traits were as expected as they were lauded when you were Diamond. But Azurites were meant to be blindly obedient. They were meant to follow orders and little else. Thus, he was flawed. A defective gem.

Time passed slowly as Black Sun continued to throw barbed, pointed remarks his way, anything to get a rise out of him. Instead of taking the bait, he chose to keep his head down, replying with answers consisting of minimal syllables and noncommittal sounds. Technically, she outranked him, as she had once served by Black Diamond's side, but when it was just the two of them, ranks mattered little.

Or perhaps that sort of thinking was simply more proof as to why he'd been deemed unfit for Homeworld. Either way, he could not change what had already been done. The best he could do was accept it and move forward.

It was while he was thinking that a boot arced through the air, hitting him squarely on the back of his head. He whipped around with a glower to see Black Sun was missing a shoe. She shrugged without feeling, saying flatly, "Whoops."

Reigning in his irritation with considerable effort, Leo picked up to the shoe, then reached out to hand it back to her. "I believe this is yours." It wasn't a question. Who else could it belong to? They were the only two on the ship.

She grinned, shark-like. "Finally got you to talk to me."

He settled against his chair, glanced at the ship's trajectory (it was self-correcting and stable), and then flipped on the ship's autopilot. They were nearly within the terrestrial planet's atmosphere, anyway. More than close enough for them to land with an acceptable margin of error.

Crossing his arms, Azurite said, "Alright. You want to talk? Let's talk. The rumors say you're insane." Her smile faltered. "Is that true?"

"Depends on your definition of insanity. As far as I'm concerned, I couldn't be saner. It's everyone else that's lost their minds." Back on Homeworld, those words would have been as good as treason. Speaking with her was dangerous.

The ship began to rattle violently as they breached the Earth's atmosphere, though Azurite was grateful for the interruption. They strapped themselves in, hands at their sides, torsos facing the console as red lights flashed and alarms blared. Temperatures rose, and though it would take much more than entry friction to burn up a gem, it was a discomfort they hoped would pass quickly. Neither had ever traveled to another planet before, and so did not know how long the heat and rough vibration would last.

Not soon enough, the ship's shields engaged, quickly stabilizing the fall and lowering the temperatures to more manageable levels. Azurite sighed internally, glad for the change. It was an experience he was not looking forward to repeating.

Black Sun threw her head, laughing. "Oh, this is exhilarating! I should have gotten myself kicked off Homeworld sooner!"

Azurite unstrapped his seatbelt once they landed, frowning at her words as his mind worked to imagine a way for a gem to purposefully have themselves banished from Homeworld . In the end, he chose to ignore the comment. He had a job to do, after all. "I'll go patrol the Kindergarten. You should remain here and check this vessel for any potential damage." That job did not include babysitting an unstable gem.

Fortunately, she nodded, putting up a mock salute. "Got it. I'll stay with the ship, Cap'n." Azurite narrowed his eyes, disdainful of her tone, but let it pass. She was obviously still trying to get a rise out of him.

After placing a radar built for detecting gem signatures in his belt, he pressed the button to open the back hatch and stepped out into the uninhabited planet, dimly aware that he was the first true gem to step foot in the Kindergarten since the war ended, thousands of years ago.


	2. pretend to be

This morning in the Hamato household was much like the others before it.

There was no storm looming on the horizon, no chill in the wind, only Casey wandering into the kitchen, still clad in a loose t-shirt and plaid boxers, with the look of a particularly low-functioning undead. Shortly after, April slipped into the kitchen, having scented out the scrambled eggs and bacon Donatello was cooking at the stove while Raphael set the table with hibiscus-themed plates.

Though they hadn't always been a part of family, they'd been friends with their adopted father for longer than either of them could remember, and Donatello threw them both a soft smile at the sight of their bleary-eyed shuffling. He chuckled under his breath. "Why don't you two take a seat at the table? Breakfast's almost ready." When April opened her mouth to protest, however, he gently waved her off, saying kindly, "You can help me clean up afterwards, okay?" Successfully placated, she plopped down into her seat, readjusting her night tee slightly when the glittering Celestite gem on her shoulder peeked past the fabric. Donnie and Raph had gotten a lot better about seeing their gems, but there were still vague memories instilled in her and Casey of how their smiles seemed to fall at the sight of them, and they'd taken to keeping them covered long after the Gems cottoned on and insisted they were fine.

It wasn't and they weren't, but so long as they stayed, so long as they didn't disappear like their parents did, then that was okay.

"Hey!" April glanced up from her plate full of eggs and bacon to see Casey shoveling food into his mouth, Raph looking on with disgust. He reached over, bopping Casey on the back of the head. "You're human, knucklehead. Eat like it."

"Only half," Casey grumbled once his subsequent coughing fit subsided. Don traded a glance with Raph over their heads, then carefully untied and set aside his apron, and told them he was heading out for some fresh air.

Raph watched him go for a moment, before climbing to his feet with a heavy sigh. Looking down at them sternly, he said, "Those eggs better be gone by the time I get back. Casey," Casey straightened with an eep, "no second helpings of bacon before those eggs are done." Then he left them on their own to follow Donatello, who was already making his way across the beach to the pier. It was where he liked to go to think, his quiet place, and usually only Raph was brave enough to go after him when he went there.

April glared at Casey. "Why'd you have to mention that?"

Casey shrugged, not quite meeting her eyes.

* * *

"I think you have a pretty good idea of what I'm going to say." Donatello glanced up at his footsteps more than his voice, his gaze dull. He shrugged. Raph sighed, settling down beside him. "Well, I've been wrong before."

He allowed his own legs to dangle over the sea, giving Donatello the time he needed to gather his thoughts. It was like that, sometimes. They'd been alive for so long, experienced so much, that for a guy who liked to think about things as much as Donatello did, it could all get a little overwhelming. Finally, Donatello took a deep shuddering breath, and with his voice muffled by his knees, said, "I dreamed about them last night." Raph stiffened. He'd expected this and it still stung like crack in his shell. "Our brothers. Our friends."

"Yeah?" Raph glanced at him, forcing himself to relax. "Figured it might be something like that." It was impossible to hide the hurt completely, however, when he managed to ask, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"And what would that accomplish?" Looking every inch of his several hundred years, Donnie shook his head. "I know misery loves company but I'm not about to rob you of a good night's sleep for no reason."

"Of course there's a reason!" Catching sight of a subtle flinch, Raph forced himself to calm down. He wanted to stand and shout - it was in his nature - but none of that would help him here. Instead, he reached out to clasp Donatello on the shoulder. "You're all the reason I need, Donnie. You shouldn't have to be alone with this stuff." When Donatello still didn't look convinced, he dug down deep. "I have nightmares, too, you know?"

It was tough, surprisingly tough after the years they'd spent with Yoshi and the kids, to admit to weakness, but gratifying when Donatello finally looked at him, his eyes wide and startled. The corners of his mouth twitched. "Next time, okay?"

Raph grinned, pushing off his shoulder to sit more comfortably on the pier. A fish jumped out of the water, its scales reflecting the sun. Donatello tilted his head back, taking in the endless blue of the sky with a contented sigh. "Casey gets more like Jet everyday, doesn't he?"

Several seconds past. Donatello heard the sound of stone scraping against wood. "You got that right. Big mouth and all."

He smiled.

 _Gems that weren't even involved in the war fought to survive, frightened of being trampled by a rampaging Jasper or shattered. Crystal Quartz had spoken out against shattering gems, had urged her rebels to incapacitate, but such pretty words could only carry so far for so long when the soil glittered with gem shards. There were screams and smoke, the acrid scent of plant life burning, and still Tanzanite held his ground, stuck to his beliefs, refused to kill._

 _Siam had wanted to give a weapon developed by one of Crystal's generals a try, something that was guaranteed to smash and crack the enemy gems like they were made out of ice instead of stone, but Jet had managed to talk him out of it. Tanzanite hadn't expected the rowdy gem to take his side on the matter, yet was undeniably grateful. The last thing he wanted was for Siam to survive the war and lose himself to shardlust._

 _"Hey Tee!" Tanzanite caught a flash of orange among the droves of Homeworld soldiers, and craned his neck over a combined Ruby in an attempt to find the owner. A blast from an Amethyst's gauntlet shook the ground, kicking up dirt. Obscuring the already chaotic battlefield._

Miles away from the pier, in a too small cave carved out for a too small body, a young gem sat up with a gasp. It touched the flower-shaped gem on its forehead for comfort, taking deep, calming breaths until the worst of the dread had passed, then poked its head outside, not expecting to see anything other than the collection of rocks and pebbles it had befriended over the years.

It certainly didn't expect to find another gem, this one taller and older, with a displeased scowl and some kind of box in its hands.

Its strange nightmare very much forgotten, the little gem crept from its cave, feeling a growing warmth in its chest it couldn't name.


End file.
